Hello Friends and Family-

To those of you who weren't on our texting list or we haven't been able to catch up with...I wanted to share some of what's been happening the last couple of weeks.

Our wooden box 

It took us awhile to figure out the timing, but we finally made the trip back to Portland to pick up Noa. We also made an effort to connect with some of the hospital staff that we never had a chance to say goodbye to. 

I was surprised when I called to make reservations (at the same hotel where both of our mothers had stayed) and the man on the phone knew Noa by name. My heart went right to my throat. He was sorry to hear she had not made it. I was nervous about seeing the people that knew us through that time...where do we go from here? What do I say? In the end, I realized I just wanted to thank them and say goodbye.

Nurse who was with Noa that night

Wonderful staff 

Susan!

We had breakfast our first morning with 3 dear ladies that had cared for Noa...very bright & kind women. They dispeled any apprehension I had, as did everyone else we saw that day.  We were able to remember, ask questions and share our sadness with them. And, we got to thank them for all their care. We visited the RMH (which the kids totally loved....free cookies and a choo-choo that does loops around the dining room ceiling) and then walked to the hospital and visited the  Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU), and the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit (PICU).
We laughed and cried with the nurses and it felt so good to see that some of them still carried our family in their hearts. It was such an awesome trip. So hard to go to the mortuary and gather the little wooden box that holds Noa, but a sweet type of closure that its done. I felt so much of God's grace during the trip. It was good to say goodbye to some and solidify bonds with others.

Justin shoveling!!

Rest of our daily life...

little unhappy guy

The snow has been fun and magical, though cold. Ruby is a trooper and can play outside happily but Emmaus gets cold and unhappy pretty quick. I try to get them out anyways. I'm one of those people that feel like we need 'fresh air' everyday! But the cold is unfriendly.

I was able to complete the process for milk donation. It felt significant to me because it was one of the few 'parenting' things I was doing for Noa. The finalization of that was good and sad. It will benefit another baby in need, but its another hope lost.

Captain of the Storm

I joined a bible study that meets every week. It's a new group of ladies...and while I don't feel like emotionally investing with them yet, I am excited to have some structure to keep me in 'the word' on a regular basis. Already I feel encouraged by some hope in my heart. God is kind and it is good for me to hear that and see it in others lives. 

Today is 6 weeks since she passed away. Our little one. I can't believe it. Still feels like a bad dream. We continue to get cards and letters and it helps so much to know that people are still thinking of us. It's like they are carrying some of the weight...it helps us to reconnect and grieve...while 'everyday life' doesn't.

Love you all

                      

Precious ones